My Big WOW Part 2

I have had a lot to absorb over the past 6 months. I still walk around with the bubble over my head and yes, when it pops, out comes:

wow bubble by http://dryicons.com

Relatively soon after I posted My Big WOW, I started to connect more pieces to my Birth Family Puzzle. My Aunt Terri messaged me some photographs and I noticed other 'cousin' connections on Facebook.

What I had overlooked - was while I was bemoaning the fact that my Aunt and her family was in Florida, and another cousin was in North Carolina, another out in Arizona - was that I had a cousin Mary - who lived really close to York, PA - where I grew up, and now visit my brother and friends. 

I could actually meet her! Happy Dance!!! About a month later I was messaging back and forth with Mary, trying to find a good date for us to get together. As it turns out the best time for us to meet was when I was up in York for St. Mary's Holiday Bazaar. 

In Mid November. :(  

At that moment I felt like that was the ~~12th of Never~~.

When we started messaging back and forth, the first thing that Mary said to me was "I just want to be where you are". Followed by "I love how you're freaking. So am I". 

Before I get too ahead of myself - and confuse you totally... here's my 

Birth Family Order - in purple are my Aunts and Uncle - their children (my cousins) are listed below their names. The dates next to their names are when I first met them online or by phone.

Marian ~~~(dec'd)

Phyllis (me - Liz)

John David (half brother - dec'd)

Catherine E. (half sister - dec'd)

My Aunt - Louise ~~~(dec'd)

Mary - Aug. 21

Kitty - Oct. 2

Louis - Jan 2016

Therese - Sept. 17

My Uncle - Tommy ~~~

Salisa - Jan 2016

JD - Nov.7

My Aunt - Terri ~~~

Diana - Aug. 2

About a month after I started talking to Mar(y), Terese, her sister messaged me and we started to get to know one another. During our first conversation she asked if I wanted to have something my mother made. I was astounded. Of course I do! And, my goodness, thank you! Turns out that something was a Greenware pumpkin. Greenware was very popular craft with house wives in the late 1950s into the 60s. 

Another month goes by and cousin Kitty chimes in. Facebook has been such a wonderful way to get to know the personalities of everyone. Then it's Jd's birthday - and I contact him to say hello. 

It's almost time to meet Mary. She is going to come to St. Mary's on the days we are pricing and setting up in Mid November. And the day and time are here. And there we are. I am crying like a baby. In complete love with her, overwhelmed, joyful, amazed - WOW!

Meeting my birth cousin for the first time.

Mar, me and one of my 'original' cousins, Joanie.

Mar with me holding the Greenware pumpkin that was made by my birth mother Marian.

Mar was sweet enough to help both days setting up for the bazaar - and we had time to visit. She even had me over for dinner and I was able to meet her husband, mother in law, daughter and grand daughter. It was lovely! 

December comes and with it, a wonderful surprise. My husband and daughter coordinated with a dear friend, Janis, and my cousin, Kitty, for me to fly out to Arizona - to not only visit with Janis who had just moved out there early last year, but also to meet Kitty! January 22nd couldn't come soon enough.

December also came with some difficult news. The man that had married my mother and was the father of my two half siblings, died on the 19th. This is now someone I will never get to talk to, nor ask questions of. His memorial is held on January 16th.

After I had posted my first Big Wow - I had a cousin (another 'original'), Kathy, contact me. 

"Lisa, I read your blog. I am so thrilled for you. You can never have too many people to love you. I travel all the time for work and I have a ton of frequent flyer miles and hotel points. If you would like to visit your birth family, I would be privledged to cover your flight and hotel room".

So this is my next adventure - tomorrow I fly to Florida to meet my Aunt Terri, cousin Diana and her husband Michael, and their little girl Charity. I have also been told that two Uncles - Lew (by marriage) and Tommy (Marian's little brother) are planning to travel from other locations in Florida to visit with me! 

My Big Wow - Part 3 will be coming shortly. I have all sorts of stories to share with you about the memorial service and my visit to Arizona. Then of course - there's this trip and Part 4!

I'll be sharing some high lights on FB - but until next time...

Hugs, Liz

My big WOW.

I have had a lot going on this past year - but this amazing piece of news takes the cake.

I have found the beginnings of my birth family.

It is my birth mother's birthday today - August 18th.

Where to begin...

I have know my birth name for years - I asked my mother while I was in labor with my first daughter, Virginia. She told me that my name was Phyllis Marie Serijack. However - that was 20+ years ago - and searching the internet was a whole different story back then. Plus - I didn't know at the time how my last name was spelled. All that my mother knew, and who knows if this was even so - was that my mother was a college student in Philadelphia when she had me. 

Dead end.

My adoptive parents Bruce and Ginny Nolin

While my adoptive mother was alive, I did not actively search for my birth mother. My Mom was amazing in so many ways, but one thing she did not have - was self confidence. I had absolutely NO desire to undermine her motherhood by doing a search for my birth mother. She was an amazing mom.

My only feeling of 'lack' within myself - was that I didn't look like anyone. No one in 'my' family looked alike - my brother Matt was also adopted - 2 years before me - from a completely different family.

Me and Matt

Very sadly - as you can read here my adoptive mom passed away in 2014. Ensue the grieving. 

She was my everything and it took all of this time to start to feel like me again.

Within the past 2 months, while searching for some important papers, I came across my adoption decree and it scared me. Not only was my birth name on the decree - but so was my birth mother's - Catherine M. Serijack. Known quantities are good right?

I kept it out - and would give it a sideways glance now and then, thinking I would 'do something' when my daughter was home in September. 

She ended up coming home a few weeks ago - and I showed her the decree. She immediately said - let's see what we can find. So we did. 

Sadly we found this - my birth mother

 and this - my two half siblings.

We found this information via Google on the Find a Grave website.

Not only was my birth mother dead, but so was my half brother (5 years younger) and my half sister (10 years younger). Wow - this sucks! Now it felt like I lost them all over again...ugh. I am still trying to wrap my head around this loss.

Thankfully, survivors were listed.

Theresa Mycoff was listed as a sister to my birth mother, Marian. Ginna immediately looked for her on Facebook - and found her! Sweet Jesus! I might be related to this woman. It is getting more and more real.  

My Aunt Terri

Then we found her daughter - my cousin, and her daughter on Facebook. Wow.

Dianna and her daughter

Me and my daughter

Ginna in Kindergarten

I think we could be related...

So then - what's next?

Well - we probably have done enough stalking for now.

The next morning, a Sunday, my dear, sweet, daughter has already Googled 'how to write a letter to someone you do not know'. She outlines some key points in a word doc and we work on crafting a sincere and convincing letter to this person - that may be my birth mother's sister. We send the letter off via a business email - we don't want to be too intrusive - just in case.

Within 20 minutes I receive this reply "You have indeed found more family. This is Terri's daughter Diana Adams. My mother would love to talk to you. Her number is xxx-xxx-xxxx".

And I burst into tears.

That day is already filled. I am taking my daughter up to York/Lancaster to catch the train back in to Philly. I ask if I can call Terri in the evening when I get back to York after dropping Ginna off at the train.

We talk for 2 hours and I think much of the time we both are in disbelief. Terri is the youngest of her family. Marian (my birth mother) was the oldest. When I was born, Marian was 21 and Terri was 2. Terri only found out about me when she was 18. By then, Marian was married and had the 'first' of her children, John. Catherine was born 4 years later.

Very sadly, in 1986, my half brother and sister, John Miller (age 21), Catherine Miller (age 17), and her husband-to-be James Carl (age 24), die in a house fire. Some how Marian and her husband managed get out of the house and survive the fire.

The thought gives one pause. I am my mother's only surviving child. And she knows nothing of me.

Marian dies 4 years later, on Nov. 26th at the young age of 52. Her death is attributed to a heart attack. Having lost a child myself, I suspect that it may have been a broken heart.

These new losses do not overshadow the fact that I now have more family. Family members that were excited and happy that I found them. How cool is that?! 

Unfortunately we have 800 miles that separate us. Thank goodness for the internet. Ginna and I are now friends with Terri and Diana on Facebook. We talk via Messenger, email, and phone.

And everytime I stop to think about my good fortune, a "WOW" bubble pops in my head, and I might have a happy cry.

SO - to my adoptive family - the family who has cradled me in their love for all of my 55 years - I love you. 

To all of my Aunts and Uncles - you have been second parents to me and my brother - scolded us when we needed it, and loved us like crazy all of the rest of the time. 

To my cousins - we were a tribe when we were young! 

You were my brothers and sisters - loving, scrapping, laughing, swimming, hide and seek, and capture the flag. You treated me and Matt no differently than the rest. I have seen most of you marry and have children, then your children marry and have children.

We have seen some of our parents die - as well as some of our siblings. A cousin who was adopted out as a baby - has found us - and we welcomed her and her children.

Please say hello to and welcome my birth family.

My family - the four of us - Dad, Mom, Matt and me (Lisa) were the smallest of the families - among both the Trulino's and the Nolin's. But this never dimmed the shine. My mother loved us fiercely, loved her family fiercely and taught Matt and I to do the same. We learned that family isn't about blood. Family is about LOVE.

One lucky girl, Liz

On this day 55 years ago

I was born, three weeks premature, to a young woman, an unwed mother, a student at university, in Philadelphia.

This wonderful young woman made the ultimate sacrifice. 

Despite the social mores of the day, she chose to carry me for 9 months (well - almost), and then do the unthinkable.
She gave me up for adoption. It resonates with me often, this incredible thing that she was doing for me, her child. She wanted me to have more than what she could give me.

I was adopted into a home with a beautiful mother and a handsome father. I had a two year old brother waiting to tease me (and he still does). 

Our mother called us her adopted darlings when we were younger. We are not related by blood, but by love. Matt will always be my beloved brother that I look up to. As much as he wanted to ditch me as a kid, he was always the first one to stick up for me when I needed him. 

My mother loved us fiercely. Both my brother and I have now celebrated our first birthdays without her. Matt was adopted just a few days after he was born, but because I was premature, I didn't 'come home' until February 2nd of the new year. Mom and I always considered that our special day.

But on this day, I think of my birth mother, and the incredible sacrifice she made for me. God Bless her, where ever she is. I hope she knows that I think of her, and love her too.

Merry Christmas,
Elizabeth Mary

Happy Groundhog Day

Boy I wish he were mine! This little fella belongs to the Lucketts Store though and he is their mascot, I guess - always dressed appropriately for the season and keeping watch over the front counter.

Groundhog Day and why I love it:

1. The absolute kitschyness of the whole event in Punxatawney, PA is too fun and over the top - I am seriously planning to attend next year.

2. My mom and I always celebrate today, because this is the day that I was released from the preemie ward and came to live with my adoptive parents. I weighed 4 pounds and had to be fed every 2 hours - my grandfather, Roland, (who was also born on 2/2 - I believe) told my mom he didn't think I was going to make it. I guess I showed him!

3. The movie Groundhog Day - I love how the main character has to keep repeating the day until he 'gets it right'.

4. It is my one year etsy anniversary - at least from the buying end! I have so enjoyed the opportunity to buy and sell in this fantastic marketplace full of such great people!

Check out Phil's site http://www.groundhog.org/